Christmas 2005 marina views

the nite scene: not sure where the whitish spots came from? but gives a bit snowy feel.

when the lights of city life are on. liked the different colours of the sky.

this is wonderful! look at the "glow" no idea how this can be at all possible.

the famous dome. Like a "mountain" ...

was having dinner with Jason ( who called us for movie: king kong), shiming, poy, yi cheng.
sitting at marina foodcourt, alone, when they went to buy food.

i am amazed by the sky, the creation of the Creator.
if creation can amazed me, how much more of the wonderous of my Creator.

i took some with a normal digital camera.
no special effects, just in case it may mistook as "edited".
nope, just pure and naturally beautiful sky. ( just like in the movie king kong-Beautiful)
enjoy... ...

Christmas 2005

Dear God.
what a day!
sometimes as i wonder if christmas would be "just the same"...
yet so many blessings and i saw Your grace once again!
God, no words can really express how i feel right now.
2005 is an awesome one!
... ...tho there is a bit of "pain" in heart somewhere, yet i want to GIVE THANKS in all circumstances!

i want to thank You for my dears in CG.
a wonderful bunch of people whom, when the time comes, i know it'll be very very difficult for me. Your grace be with me.
Yet let Your will be done.
Lee: who came still despite the already made appt. Gal: keep on keeping on! touched when u gave the notebooks to the CG people. Thank You.
Kim: always treasure u very dear friend, let this christmas touch you too. :0 "hip-hop" ya, nvr see before rite? hee. ( just btw kim and me)
sandy: Lord i amazed by You.... ... Joy of the Lord shall be our strength! glad have you beside together for His work!
poy: thankful and touched by your initiative in "relieving workload" when i was "super stressed"! the piggy face bell shall always cheer me up...
Lingling: so encouraged to see you joining us! it was great and hope u enjoyed too! ( the fun side that u "nvr" yet saw before...:P)
Lyndi: so encouraged that despite sprained ankle, u came for svc! :) contd to keep heart for Jesus yo!
jia wei: always know i can count on you, becoz u are faithful lo. thanks for helping in ways that i really appreciate.
Dennis: christmas also is a good start for many good blessings from Him. thank you for supporting.
YC: sometimes, compliments be discrete la! gd thing i know you enuff when u comment. :P but tt's sweet from a brother.
Law: woho! breakthrough! may it start the "ball rolling" for many more. gotta have a treat from you on SUN LUNCH!
Mingzhu: thankful i can share some time with u the few nite before, coz i dun think i had time with u on christmas day. encouraged by your simple desire.
Shiming: wei, why u always "hide behind my back"? dun need "halo" on my head. stand up front, bro, for Him! let's do it for 2006!
June: miss your presence at service today... ...
Ian and ryan: little poys, u two really made my christmas day so much memorable! :)
wilson: xiaodi xiaodi. 2nd christmas! really thank ful for a good friend like u.
Joe: see u smile smile throughout the nite. hope u enjoyed it through too.
Jason: hey, first time i hear from you wanting to say grace... what does this means? :) hee.
Alan and beekeow and chloe: really so amazed by You! so glad they can hear this message. pray for blessing and protection over this family.
JasonLee and Elaine: good to know new friends today. friendly, pity they need leave svc early.
Brian: the same blue guy. now more "talkative" than the last time i met him.
Lily: always can talk with her, tho she's a mother of two liao. May the true meaning of christmas fill her heart!
yanyun: now, whenever i think of her, i will rem God, Your timely plan to bring her to church.
Jinghui: a easy to get along new friend.

Melvin and Michael: two of Gaode's friends...camp mates- "would we be in time for countdown" qtn they keeping asking me....:P
Melina: amsterdam. dutch. internship. unique friend.
Gim Peng: nite shift, could not join us. supper at stall. tampines, neighbour of Sandy now...glad to hve him joining us.

through it all, what a christmas!
m surprised and touched by:
a card from my ex-shep, Jean, and it's one which got a penguin on it...a long story not to be said here. :p
a present from my ex-studentNic, its been so long, yet still can sense the appreciation. its nothing i did, just a little help to him when he needed it for his studies.
a handshake cum gift from Guohui, the brother i have learnt a lot. his patience is so much a strength in him!

Jesus i believe in You,
that as long as faithful, You will bring the fruits of my heart desire.
:)
so amazed....
zZzzZZzzz ... ...in Your sweetness.

Everything will soon be over.

Long ago, there was a king with varying temper. so he decided to change this bad temper.

thus, he called upon high ranking officals and asked them for solutions.
all of them cracked their brains and finally decided to make a ring engraved with
"everything will soon be over" to him.
when the king is in sorrow, he will look at the ring and understands that"everything will soon be over".
When he is in joys, til over cloud nine, he will look at the ring and perceieves that
"everything will be over", no pt to be too proud of it.
in life, there are joys and sorrows, but rem that "everything will soon be over".
No matter how hard a life is, when we think of it in the old days, it still brings back sweet memories.
( a translated version from chinese)

It is more blessed to give than to recieve.

yes, indeed, how "hard" it is to give.
when human mind is conceived much about themsleves, what "I" want, what "I" need, "ME" etc...
nothing will ever come across the mind to GIVE.
to give Love, to Give their time or resources, even to just simply Give a thought or a simple consideration for others.
it pains to give even more especially if the giving is "rejected"/ unresponded.
Can giving then be continuous?

Sometimes we take for granted when we are the ones who receive.
it could have taken a lot for the other to give,
yet, ignorance was all about it.
on the other side of the one who gives, feelings of disappointment.
even when it was thought to be of mutual deep friendship.
to give to a trusted friendship, the more disappointed when not recieved.
Can giving then be continuous?

He(Jesus) came to serve not to be served.
He came to give not to recieve.
Can giving then be continuous?
only when dependence on His giving.
He gave His life for me.
His Love will be continuous.
amen!

"everything will soon be over"

God is God, man is man

recd a email, a story....

God and the Geese

There was once a man who didn't believe in God, and he didn't hesitate to let others know how he felt about religion and religious holidays. His wife, however, did believe, and she raised their children to also have faith in God and Jesus, despite his disparaging comments. One snowy Christmas Eve, his wife was taking their children to service in the farm community in which they lived. They were to talk about Jesus' birth. She asked him to come, but he refused.

"That story is nonsense!" he said. "Why would God lower Himself to come to Earth as a man? That's ridiculous!"

So she and the children left, and he stayed home. A while later, the winds grew stronger and the snow turned into a blizzard. As the man looked out the window, all he saw was a blinding snowstorm. He sat down to relax before the fire for the evening. Then he heard a loud thump. Something had hit the window. He looked out, but couldn't see more than a few feet. When the snow let up a little, he ventured outside to see what could have been beating on his window.

In the field near his house he saw a flock of wild geese. Apparently they had been flying south for the winter when they got caught in the snowstorm and couldn't go on. They were lost and stranded on his farm, with no food or shelter. They just flapped their wings and flew around the field in low circles, blindly and aimlessly. A couple of them had flown into his window, it seemed.

The man felt sorry for the geese and wanted to help them. The barn would be a great place for them to stay, he thought. It's warm and safe; surely they could spend the night and wait out the storm. So he walked over to the barn and opened the doors wide, then watched and waited, hoping they would notice the open barn and go inside.
But the geese just fluttered around aimlessly and didn't seem to notice the barn or realize what it could mean for them. The man tried to get their attention, but that just seemed to scare them, and they moved further away. He went into the house and came with some bread, broke it up, and made a bread crumb trail leading to the barn. They still didn't catch on.
Now he was getting frustrated. He got behind them and tried to shoo them toward the barn, but they only got more scared and scattered in every direction except toward the barn. Nothing he did could get them to go into the barn where they would be warm and safe.
"Why don't they follow me?" he exclaimed. "Can't they see this is the only place where they can survive the storm?"
He thought for a moment and realized that they just wouldn't follow a human. "If only I were a goose, then I could save them," he said out loud. Then he had an idea. He went into barn, got one of his own geese, and carried it in his arms as he circled around behind the flock of wild geese.
He then released it. His goose flew through the flock and straight into the barn -- and one-by-one, the other geese followed it to safety.

He stood silently for a moment as the words he had spoken a few minutes earlier replayed in his mind: "If only I were a goose, then I could save them!" Then he thought about what he had said to his wife earlier. "Why would God want to be like us? That's ridiculous!"
Suddenly it all made sense. That is what God had done. We were like the geese--blind, lost, perishing. God had His Son become like us so He could show us the way and save us.
As the winds and blinding snow died down, his soul became quiet and pondered this wonderful thought. Suddenly he understood why Christ had come. Years of doubt and disbelief vanished with the passing storm. He fell to his knees in the snow, and prayed his first prayer:

"Thank You, God, for coming in human form to get me out of the storm!"

-- this somehow reminds me of the gospel rally i went on last sunday.
that i rem Rev Stephen Tong gave a clear and interesting illustration that the higher life form can understand the lower life form, but not the other way.
God is God, man is man.
there is a gap between God and man,
therefore,
“This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.”
1 John 4:9-10 (NIV)

Jesus came as sinless Man to be like us,
to tell us and show us that God loves you.

i pray and hope this christmas will be a different one!

1 Cor 2:9-10

1 Cor 2:9-10 (NIV)
However as it is written:
No eye has seen, no ear has heard,
no mind has conceived what GOd has prepared for those who love Him.
but God has revealed it to us by His Spirit,
The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God.

(sharing this as a personal testimony of how God is all knowing and He uses ordinary people to draw us to Him. our sensitivity to Him not depends only our human effort like religiously praying longer, reading more studiously etc, its by His grace. He speaks as we desire to hear from Him.
Even if seen as "coincidental", God makes it "coincidental" enough, to let us human beings knows, He knows our hearts.amen.)

was a normal day. MOn (12/12/05)
went over to sandy's place to make "baos" actually one of my other fav food, besides fish soup. just had one nice big bao on sunday...
would appreciate "baos" makers now a little bit more, coz the process of making 'baos", NOT EASY. i gave up and started playing with her nephew.
went to kim's museum to pass her a mission cd.
on the way to museum, suddenly feel giddy and headache.
decided to buy food for dinner, maybe can help ease the giddiness.
on the usual way back from SK interchange, as i was walking along the path,
it was about 9+pm.
stg just prompted in my heart to pray for xiaodi.
i dun really know what to pray for.
half heartedly coz of the eagerness to reach home and eat my food then. :P
anyway, was reminded of the unit cg time, when GR shared about certain areas we can pray for people...so started praying for xiaodi in those areas. also pray for his safety since he's in Japan and also for his experience there so that he can know God.
as i reach home, somehow the giddiness went away.
so before i break my day's fast in that sense, i decided to pray a little while for him...
funny thing is also the hunger for food not tt appealing anymore too...
then i went ahead for with my dinner,
thank God that everyone out, so i could pray comfortably in the living room...
started to do my stuff....making some things....

then received a "call" not familiar no. on the hp....
strange.
then ...over the other line... "mu shi mu shi"...eh, familiar voice though.
it was xiaodi!
it was about 10+pm.
i thought for a moment : is he back in spore again?
nope, he just told me he's kinda "lost" in Japan.
asking me if dennis called so that he can connect to dennis who also in japan too etc...

i was taken back, dun really know how to react.

yet as i blogged this,
i thank GOD
He showed His all-knowing aspect of His character.
now i know.
why the prompting of prayer came just a hour before he called.
it was God wanting me to pray safety for a friend, this xiaodi.
i would not know what could have happen. i would never know too.
is this really "coincidental"?
all i know God is good.
all i know God has reveal it to us by His Spirit ( 1 Cor 2:10a)
all i know God is watching over us.
Keeping us safe and alive.

and to this...
i think again...
would there be so many coincidentals?
i rem the strong words that ringing in my heart that came before i met xiaodi at the service.
"there must be a purpose"
that's why i turned to ask xiaodi whether he can go for the Stephen Tong's Gospel rally.
knowing his flight is delayed.

Father, i thank You for You are so good. thank YOu fo using me to pray for people even when i am as ordinary as any other one. I thank You for YOur grace for "spotting" me right there when You wanted to call us to serve You in Your divine activity.God, You are always God, and i pray for us, ambassadors for Christ will truly experience the joy and meaning of serving You.and we will never ever entertain thoughts that's according to the pattern of the world, but always renewed by Your Word. I pray for those who have not yet know You, they will truly experience You, they will open their hearts to trust in You though they may not see You. Father, everything in Your time. IN Jesus name, Amen!

Indeed in a recd sms wise words says:
only when one is lost, then can he be found.
:)

2 special songs

one: "love me" - colin raye
too bad i dun have the lyrics...
i liked it the first time i heard it some months ago.
that time i first heard it, it just reminded me of my dad.

i would say i am not a "listening to songs" person.
but once i like a song, i would try to remember.
especially those of significance to me.

rem just recently, while on conversation,the song came to my mind again.
in heart: hm, where can i hear this song again?

then came back from Unit CG on fri.
went on msn, saw xiaodi, and somehow talking about chicken little songs, he then sent me 2 songs...one is the "love me" song!!!

the other song is "Its a long long journey"- corrine may
the first time i really hear it through.
also got the lyrics from him.

what a song.
i got me tearing the first time i hear it!
somehow because before this, along the way back on my own after CG, i told God stg.
... ...
the song lyrics somehow spoke into my heart.

Search me , O God, and know my heart.
Test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting. (Psa 139:23-24)

use my life to Praise You!
many things i dont understand
many paths i dont see now
YET
i trust in You
Your perfect plan and purpose
even at the end
things dont turn out the way i desire it to be
i already know i would learn so much
i would have drawn so much closer to You
keep my mind fully focus on You
my heart to fully love You
my strength fully to serve You and Your people
my soul to fully sensitive to You
all by Your grace.
God, my wonderful Father.

ok, share with you this nice song-

Journey - Corrinne May

It's a long long journey
Till I know where I'm supposed to be
It's a long long journey
And I don't know if I can believe
When shadows fall and block my eyes
I am lost and know that I must hide
It's a long long journey
Till I find my way home to you

Many days I've spent
Drifting on through empty shores
Wondering what's my purpose
Wondering how to make me strong

I know I will falter
I know I will cry
I know you'll be standing by my side
It's a long long journey
And I need to be close to you

Sometimes it feels no one understands
I don't even know whyI do the things I do
When pride builds me up till I can't see my soul
Will you break down these walls and pull me through

Cause it's a long long journey
Till I feel that I am worth the price
You paid for me on Calvary
Beneath those stormy skies
When Satan mocks and friends turn to foes
It feels like everything is out to make me lose control
Cause it's a long long journey
Till I find my way home to you
To you

Frank&Melanie

new friends i got to know.
at chloe's shower BD (alan&beekeow)
4th dec 05, aloha loyang.

in my heart,just wanted to bless one friend, and how wonderful God has blessed me in return.

melanie, a gentle mother of two, a gal of 3yrs and another boy,4mths.
a youth counselor in her church,and now working as nurse.
know her for the first time, and somehow strike a conversation so easily with her.
only later that i know she's serving in a church at punggol.
admired her story. her life, her commitments, her marriage with Frank etc.
saw a tender and serving heart in her.
what a sister, so much i can learn from her.
she asked me one qtn.
only replied to her: Let God decide.
God, pray that you will truly bless her in her life, its has not been easy for her to be a servant in Your kingdom, a mother of two young kids, a nurse at CGH, a wife for Frank etc....Protect her, and let whatever comes into her life as she takes up the challenges ahead of her, strengthened her! Amen.

Moment.
i thank God for special people who comes across in my life.
sometimes, i will never know when they will come by again, yet it is this kind of moments to be treasured and "blogged". =p

TAGGED...here i go again.

hm, its 215am now!
n wide awake.
thankful no work tmrw, and its holidays! about a full two+ weeks! (end dec still need go back school for meetings again, and CCAs hor...hee) so glad to have this long awaited break, before the "battle" begins again.

erm, gonna share about 5 weird things about myself. ( joining in the "game" Neoh has started)
but before that, one very distinct "weird" thing about choot (which is me) is that i like to talk a lot...haha. in writing i mean.
so before i begin my weird things about myself, i like to share some of my moments la.....:)
here i go again...

well, after the previous blog, i thought to myself, i wan to stop blog for a while, at least this dec. erm, for certain personal reasons.
and somehow got "things" in heart that almost "bursting to share" so decide to contd blogging. hee. weird thingy.

the "battle" shall begin again Jan 2006! with little kids! Pri 1 and twos! gonna be such a great challenge. cant imagine the "what ifs" that the experienced teachers are telling me....
what ifs:
the kid mistook the classroom as toilet. what is the S.O.P ( standard operation procedure)?
the kid cries for mama....??
etc...
yet.
i thank God for this opportunity.
for i am the only contract teacher who gets to have hands-on in the 2 different sessions, teaching kids from Pri 1 to Pri 5. that's quite a good stretch to know the different teaching skills etc.
and it'll also be a chance for me to have better time management, now in afternoon session next year, got to balance with ministry and personal life.
get to learn from different teachers. somehow, i am the only contract teacher who gets to work with almost all the chinese teachers in sch. ( since the two sessions teachers seldom work together)
pretty much exposure to full-pledged teaching. :)

Jump...
so why i am so wide awake now?
drank a nice nescafe mocha just now, thought me being "piggy" it would not have much effect on me...i was wrong. :P
want to take that as i walked home.
to use the time for thoughts and to enjoy the walk, the usual path.
hm, "disappointed" that it rained. took bus instead.
but thankful.
i reached home early, and my mum, er jie, and xiao di were home.
took the time to strike conversations....with each of them.
aiya, in my family, not like that kind, we talk about our life to one another that easily lor....( my family is traditionaly type one)
need deliberate effort one, need to have those "weird" starting sentneces etc...
anyway, just start talking "nonsense" sometimes helps in my family...haha.
had a good time with mum, havnt been talking with her for some time. i mean really two way conversations. many times, i just tell her things, then i go off to work , or outside to meet people.
i pray she'll come for this year's christmas service again, like last year.
perhaps, God, would You touch her heart like You did for my dad? it'll be a wonderful christmas gift. there wont be anything i want already for this year's christmas. :)
and er jie, though there are things i do not agree with her, but i came to understand her more. i begin to let go of my own views, being more accepting to her perspectives. and i get closer to her life, what she wants, who she is as a person. of course, cyril is almost part of this family liao.
and my this xiao di, try my best to include him more in our conversations, since he always "OUT" in camps. really dun have much time with him.
perhaps, will just go out with him alone, just to know him better. erm, that's a weird thing to do, in my this family. hee.

today. significant. moments.
went out for a lunch buffet with colleagues.
Excelsior Hotel. Eat-all-U-can lunch buffet at only $9.80+++ only!
a farewell lunch for Bai Lao Shi. he resigned. wanted a break from teaching.
i was personally surprised, coz he's the jovial kind. yes, i think he's also "stress" during classes, yet , everytime, in staff room, he's always the one who makes everyone laugh, and seems to be cheerful, hopeful about teaching etc. in fact, he is the one "mentor"ing me during my inital times, helping me a lot in coping the school systems and teaching etc.
it'll be a loss for the sch and the teaching staff.
what is teaching?
why teach?

then they went off for karaoke....hee.
didnot join them for two reasons:
1) didnt like to sing.
2) time constraint.
decided to walk around city area in that two+ hours to spend.
just walk, a time on my own, a time for thoughts, a time just be myself with Him.
i have no idea where to go, but just walk wherever my "legs" brings...
so i went towards bras basah...maybe the books are attractive there.
met Jeremy. he's also in teaching. he started to share with me his plans in teaching etc...without knowing i was in teaching now too. what he shared is valuable to me. shed soem light and clues to my "confused" thoughts. i think we stood there and talked for about 20mins.
... ...
"ask yourself if u are the kind of person who is satisfied in receving intangible rewards?"
"teaching is about passion...it requires giving, giving all the time..."

then i went up to popular.
just somehow went to the non-fiction section.
picked up a book on "small houses", always liked to look at houses, those with very unique architectural designs...perhaps influenced by my da jie last time. then explore other books... children's sections, wine tasting, origami books, and finally, religious section.
met a elderly uncle there. ( ard 70+ years)
he started sharing by asking me: u like to read books?
then he went on to share about his teaching experiences, now he's a retiree.
he was surprised when later he asked me if i was still studying or working, and i told him i am teaching now too...
... ...
"when u chose to do something, be sure really like it. otherwise it wont last."
"open eyes, hear and learn, speak less unless to ask questions..."
" God bless you."
it was quite weird that he actually came around that section twice to talk to me.
and the third time, he brought another elderly aunt.
he soften and said:" when i talk to you ( refers to me) i must let her ( his wife) know..."
we all laughed.
another weird thing the wife did was to "touch" the elderly uncle's chin...what a lovely and cute couple. its wonderful to see their love so everlasting.
i am thankful.
the uncle would never have know, God has used him to speak into me.
out of this wide universe, at such a time like this, who would have known better that i needed someone like him to say such things at this time....ONly the ALMIGHTY GOD!!

met up with su ching, shi ming, sandy at Marina foodcourt.
- mountains in spore?! nope, just that overlooking at the sky from the foodcourt, the clouds in the sky seems to look like mountains....with the sunset colours. the "durian"s still there...
kim joined us later....
had such good time talking and sharing....shiming true to himself, shared a lot, and make the gals all have a common "point" towards him...haha. and sometimes, even through times like these, a deeper friendship is built. we get to "catch" one another's freq much faster and deeper.

my first time up the roof terrace of esplanade.
i like the scenery up there.
there are many people walking from where i looked down.
each is still so unique. people are still so precious.
God loves these children of HIS.
do they know God loves them?

jump....
tagged. so i shall begin to share my weird thngs rite?!
1) i am one who can share and share, then forgot i got to share "weird" things about myself.
2) i cannot joke lo! :P cracking jokes also got to learn ya.
3) i can get encourage even no words said. eg: looking at the sky. haha.
4) i am a gal who doesnot like to shop. only purposeful shopping for me la.
( includes going with people to shop, it's ok for me.)
5) i can eat fish soup at any time, any where, any meals...haha.

actaully, hor...i gave more than 5 weird things about myself, if u are attentive, as i share in this blog, i also share about other things also....:P

God, thankful for this day's moments!
-sometimes, when we missed someone, then we realised how much the person means to us, how much the person has already occupied in our hearts-
perhaps i shall just contd to blog.
for sometimes, what we do is not for ourselves already, its for "the other".