Beliefs, Values, Time-School's Contact time

Though i have heard from many that the weekly contact time is "passing or rather wasting time" for edu officers...
yet some times, its how we see it ...
and from the 1hr plus, there's always something i can learnt.....

Last week's:
P posed a qtn to us: What is the role of teachers to me?
can teachers have a private and public face?

VP ended with his usual composure....and smile, (paraphrased)
how we spend our time reflects the values we hold. and what values we hold reflects the beliefs we have. and we will be passing on the values to the kids because we spent time with them.

perhaps, its about time to really think through,
as teachers ( whether in schools, or in any other capacity, as long as u are teaching another...)
am i teaching the right things?
where does the stand on the right or wrong things comes from?

Interestingly, yesterday's Service, ( 8-10pm, Touch community theatre)
A new Me for a new year ( 1 pet 2:1-8)

there's this segment on hypocrisy...

had iterestingly conversation over dinner time with jason, rach, mingzhu.
qtn: what if we behave accordingly to the appropriateness to the ocassion? it this hypocrisy?

Hypocrisy- not being the real self.

i shared with them that in sch, i disciplined my kids direct to the point, many times, to "show" that i am "angry" so that it can help them to relate the behaviour / thinking etc is wrong.
it has to be done that way, coz they are young ( some are still, though we see many kids are getting smarter/ rather mature faster at their age) and they are at the stage to be taught to know between right and wrong things.
so i would truly say i am a "different" person at school.
Coz i wont be "like that" when i am in church, family, with my friends etc....

however, even when i am at sch, i am still being my true self.
i had no intention to be someone else, or mask myself etc...
even when i "discipline" is also the way i am and would do it "what i am" can do.

its a thin line between hypocrisy and relating...
i thank God i have Him to guide me to the right way.
to be true to myself, yet being assured that even as imperfect as i am, i am a "beautiful" child in His arms....He accepts me as who i am, and He will teach me into all truth.
Because Jesus is in me, He's the way, the truth and the life.

Thoughts of the Moments

Awarding picture of the year 2005-
"New Generation 5 B 2"
its a heart warming pic.
behind this, i had my personal laughs, tears, encouragements, heartaches, joy, perseverance...which u all may or may not see, i guess.
most important of all, i had God in this family.
(yicheng: tks for complimenting my cuteness in dancing....eh, prefer "beautiful" haha, coz cute=ugly but adorable)
and i want blog this too!
coz its very memorable.

anyway,
when we(CLs) got to know we had to dance,
its was like...er...can we do it?
i am not a dancing person,
tho i danced before in my JC days....mass dances kind.
i know this dance is dedicated for u all.
a little token of appreciation for your hearts in serving together for our Lord in this family.
thank you, His dear CG.
for this wonderful year 2005.

i hope 2006, will be a year of breakthroughs for each of you.
here praying for u,
TCC

2nd thoughts

having 2nd thoughts is good.

sometimes it just gets me back onto the track where i am supposed to be.
"its a long long journey, till i know where i am supposed to be....
... i know i will falter ....i know You will standing by my side, its a long long journey....
sometimes it feels no one understand, ...."

many things have happen and revealed.
my conversations with a few people have helped me on chewing on my 2nd thoughts.
poy,alan, siew qin, joel, xiaozu

my life, His calling.
a timely sermon which reaffirms on my 2nd thougths.
we gain when we give-sacrifice.
fulfil the calling for Christ.
move on with perseverance.
what You call, i choose to trust in You that You will provide.

*** *** *** ***

Forgetful behavior.... has consequences.
saw this slogan in a poster.
it somehow spoke to me in a recent encounter in getting new year decorations for my school.
its amazing how God answered my prayer.
i ask Him: what should i do? write on the blank piece? or i just treat it as to "give" tt amt to the school?
then i saw the above words in my usu routine route to Nexus on sun.
went back school, told them the truth, din expect them to pay me back.
but to let them know so that they can have a better estd budget for next year....
and it turn out they can still push to claim back the amt.
integrity. was not able to pinpoint tis word until today's teaching from siew qin.
upholding His Truth was not easy, i was "tempted" to do otherwise.
but by His grace, i heard Him.
so did as He said.
and He bless me back that i was able to claim the amt back!
praise the Lord.
we will be bless when we stand on His word.

friend who has impacted me

1) had posted stg here few days earlier, but being "imperfect" still in machines, all those i type just went blank...maybe it just was not sup to be posted here...:P Hai...but i dint find tt time wasted. for the time i used to type, i wrote out in words that i can see, i am putting thoughts to it and seeing it myself. it works for me personally to truly digest what are my thoughts. anyway, its a little "research" on 3 different bible translations on the verse Luke 9:23 ( and which same verse was repeated 3 times in the each gospel except John.) so can imagine the length i type out...plus my thoughts on it, the verse that made an impact on me, especially when its like a New Year verse to me. a new start etc....shall move on, and not "whine" abt this "loss"...haha.

mayb its good for u, to ponder yourself and discover the verse. :P

2) took a bit time out from my planning for work. its late now. yet i find a lot of joy within me. for i find myself truly enjoying work. not just work but something i enjoy and find meaning to it. yes, the planning is a bit tedious and a lot of preparation to do for the kids, yet i see what i am doing now is not just for now, but into the future that i do not yet see. ( somehow this sentence keeps repeating in my mind, especially these few days....) moulding, getting them interested about creative learning, being innovative, really and truly educate. i thank God i am a chinese teacher, haha, though i m self-aware that my chinese is really not up to standard yet. coz chinese teacher are given the task to teach moral education, which is the channel to build te correct values in kids. its a privilege. as i look into the teaching guidebook, there are many things i desire to teach the kids. and i pray i have the capacity to guide them in the correct values, through ways they can understand and sows seeds into their lives. which is into the future i cant see now.

sometimes, wonder how i can enjoy work? ( a qtn for me last two years...)
perhaps its abt finding where your calling is.
the piece of puzzle that is uniquely to be fitted in.
( i thank God who knows my future and He has been faithful to guide me through)
and i know, deep within, teaching is not all...there' will come a time again, He will show.

funny moments at school this week:
a) i asked a kid what's his surname? he looked up to me, blurred face.
then i asked again.
he said: " rabbit"
haha, i think he thought i am asking him the year he was born. ( the shi2 er4 sheng1 xiao4)

b) got a pri one class. sup to have 7 kids joining the class from another split class. so for the first 2 days i just counted 7, and thought they are all in.
later, then me and another chinese teacher realised one kid in each class of our classes had gone to the wrong class, swopped identity....missing kid in action! haha. blur kids and blur teachers.

c) got a very cute boy, yong zheng. small and wear glasses. asked him to self introduce.
" how many people are there in your family?"
" i got ba4 ba , he2 ma1 ma...( in chinese)....he2 that grandpa...and grandma...( in english) oh no, another kid who's speaks more english at home...etc.

and i got a boy very cute also, called Yi Cheng! haha. easy to remember this boy lo. ;P

3)
went to a wake on friday.
recd the msg from another friend. and the last nite svc is fri.
qtn: " why didnt she tell us?"
rch ard 830pm, after i put down my heavy books at home after the long day at sch.
i sat there right behind at the void deck.
the place was filled with many youngsters/ mid-twenties.
the deceased is a grandma of 84yrs old.
how strange.
pastor was already at his 2nd point abt : heaven is a wonderful place.
then after sharing a while pastor encouraged us to give an applause for the late grandma.
indeed funeral for believers is only a joyful ocassion.
that the deceased is in a better place now.
( that always remind me of him)
a day in the house of the Lord is better than a thousand elsewhere.
in a split of the eyewink, we will all meet together! amen.
( i had a little regret, the banner hanged up during his time was not a cross. Yet i told myself, its HIS timing.)
somehow, it brings that longing much stronger.
yet, i have not fulfil my promise to him.
so i know its not time yet.
it will take some time now.
"slowly, steadily, surely, the time approaches when the vision will be fulfilled. if it seems slow, wait for it patiently, for it will surely take place. it will not be delayed. - Habbkkuk 2:3
God, i pray for Your hand to open a way.
truly what will hold my family together is You.
You gave us the "same" blood to be together as a family,
i pray the day will come all of us are cleansed by Christ's blood.
amen.

anyway, Jer has been such a inspiring friend to me. ( its gonna be our 13year anniversary soon...)
a sister-in-Christ too!
though we may serve the same God in different church, yet our friendship has deepen so much because of the same vision we had.
to be with God and serve Him.
she's a friend whom i dont meet very often, we can dun meet for many months, yet the moment we get together, there' no lack of conversation.
we both know we are limited by time. our time is use for other purposes God has place in our lives.
i rem i met up with her recently, and i was so glad she asked me out.
at suntec food court, i was puzzled, i do not know how to help her.
yet i was glad she shared with me and i was there to be with her.
God, i pray she will sort out her thoughts with You in that area.
m glad too for her now she has a "partner-" a spiritual man to lead her.
God, i pray You will guide both of them in Your timing and will.
that they can be great couple You can work through them.

a young lady, the eldest of 3 other siblings.
youngest now only 17.
had to face loss of dad at her 'A' levels.
yet she scored such good grades.
another "blow" when a year right after, her mum just passed away.
single handedly raised her siblings with her grandma.
and now, even the only elder has left them to be with God.
yet she stands firm, such strong heart, for this, i truly admire her.
for sometime ago, i saw her went through that path.
one path i thought: maybe God, You are putting too much of an obstacle in front of her..."
yet she has triumph because the strong faith she has in God was tested and stands firm.
God, i pray she too will triumph over this "obstacle" right now for her.

indeed, a friend who has impacted me a lot.