what a day! *:)

its the 5th day!!!
"kept" inside house for 5 whole days, just imagine.

now the contd of Jonah....

i thought it would be over
soon over
until YOu said "No."
i asked:"Why? i thought i know enough already. i thought i saw what You wanted to show. i thought that is enough already...i thought..."
inside of heart,
"Why? what is it?.."
i dont see it.
why dont You speak?

but then again...
heart was not still.
not still enough to hear,
even You speak,
i may not hear.

eyes are physically impaired.
but never let it be for my spiritual eyes.

deep down,
the waves of turbulence
my own thoughts and voices around me
has lost sight of Him
of who He really is
of His intent of what is going on

here i am
i give my heart to You once more
i turn my thoughts to You once more
i want to see You, really
its quite a struggle not able to hear You
You show me Your ways
i give up my "right" to be angry
( like Jonah)

"Is it right for you to be angry about this?" Jonah 4:4

sorry.
for my wilful ways.
i took it into my hands.
i had wanted it my way

"Holy Spirit, touch me from above
Holy Spirit fill me with Your love
Holy Spirit, move upon my life
Holy Spirit stirs me inside

i yield to You
Spirit of the Lord
do Your work in me
i yield to You
Spirit of the Lord
do Your work in me" (song)

Thank You, ever so tenderly loving
i rejoice for this rebuke
for it made me know
You loved me so much
enough to let me know
enough to let me go through another 2 days
enough to show me despite i was "angry"
enough patience with me to whisper to me

Father, pray that my heart will continuosly yield to You
as i walk on, i know there will be more times i "can" be angry
maybe i would, for i am not perfect
but let me be quick to be still
still to hear Your voice.
to be rebuked so that i can change.
Thank You for all that You have done.

what a day! ... ...

its also a day that i finished my journal book...one that i had with me for the past years....
going to get a new one, a thick one, that i can start another book again....
hm, how many i had since i start journaling...cant remember. :p

The Virus Story-all abt it.

tues.
woke up with a red eye...ignore it.
went school.
only after the first lesson 9+am....already felt pain...told myself "hang on there"
went until the last lesson which is half the day.
went into the "stressful" class as i would term it now...
coz i always have difficulty in getting their attention...
but as the days goes by, i am somehow "capturing" , at least two of them now, out of the gang of 6. hm...catching their hearts now..."wah, to think teacher also got to think of ideas to capture the students hearts....in the heart language,i mean. last time, when we were still schooling, we were all so obedient le...
anyway, back to the class, two of the gals saw me with red eyes, told me to go back home and rest....
and i was touched, wah, at least got two concerned about me...hee.

home, feverish, slept.
woke up in evening, so swollen eyes, that i felt pain and could not really open my eyes.
went to SK clinic.
the doc surprised that i couldnt open eyes....
gave me eyes drops and ointment.

slept. its a pig's life.
or rather, a sick person's life. hee.

wed.
oh no...still swollen.
looks serious liao...
slept again....

missed "friends of South America"
had wanted so much to go...but i let it go...:)

woek up on thurs, hoping to see a better eye.
hm...thank God! the swollen part externally has gone, fever has gone.
only the internal still red.
yeah, i thought: i can go CG today!
until, my mum came to me, she said she got red eye.
then, a while later, my 2nd sis also woke up with a red eye.
just then, i recd sms from my xiaomei, she asked me if my red eye infectious, coz she also got red eyes!
wow, a family of red eyes!
i was very taken aback.
something new i experience in my whole life, at least to what i can remember.
it start with me, and it spreads so fast.
(* note: stg came to my mind about this..will blog in another entry)
i feel sad, to cause so much inconvenice to my fam.
feel amusing, to the impact it can have on one another because we live together.
feel worry, because of the kids i can come into contact with on tues.
and they are going to have exams soon.
Pray they are in Your safe Hands.

went to see the same doc again thurs noon.
he was smiling to me when he sees me, saying my eyes are better now....
but when i told him, it is infectious, and my whole fam got it...
he laughed...
and i actually laughed together with him...coz i find him so funny.
a doc actually laughed in front of patient?! hm...:P
anyway, i came out of doc's room, only to find my xiaomei queueing alsoin the sme clinic.
and of course, she went in and told the doc she got from me, she said the doc laughed again...
aiyo...a comical doc.

finally, everyone was at home.
my mum, 2nd sis, myself and xiaomei.
somehow like being "quarantined"
now i prob can feel how last time those people feel when they are quarantined.
and it came to mind, it was for very long time since we had a time together.
after those times, it seems all of us had went back to our own time schedule.

during this period.
i was first sad, coz i asked myself: why am i sick again? after tt long sore throat thingy...
i was uncomfortable with the time i had, coz i am used to a busy schedule.
everyone sms me to rest, and i felt a bit uncomfortable.
prob it was a signal that i shld slow down my pace.
i was touched by a few sms.
got one funny sms from shiming: cooled me like how God cooled Jonah....tt's a cute prayer lo!
( coz i was having fever....jonah was sheltered by a plant God made it there to cool him from scorching sun)
and smses just came in to ask me how i was....was very touched, esp those prayers....Thaks to all....Siew Qin, Rach, GR, Kim, Dennis, Sandy, Yi cheng, Poy, Law, Shiming, xiaodi......
my CG. i love you all. ( haha, can only say in my blog, i cant say it out to you all when face u all la...me still "shy" ) :p
got a sweet one from gao de: about pdwerful prayer ya...hee, its God's hands. Keep praying, then u'll get to hear more, see more and experience more. knew u prayed very hard.
got a cute one from Xiaodi: "meet up after the cats and dogs?" haha....my ans: No! even after the cats and dogs ran away, nope, not meeting u...haha...coz u may gonna get it too lo.
got a enlightening one from poy: even when eyes are impaired, we still can see the sight of God....hm...words of wisdom lo.

during the time i had, finally slowed down my pace.
to take time.
to appreciate life itself.
siew qin called me, and we just talked. not rushed.
after CG, poy came over, was a surprised "visit" tho suspecting from his sms, sounded like he would come over. was nice talking to him, feeling like "qurantined" victim finally found someone to talk to ....

after this whole episode.
hope be over soon.
i knew myself better.
i knew my Father better.
what a week.
what a experience.
what a life.
anything can come.
Life in itself is uncertain.
once again,
it reveals Him awesomeness
His sweetness to me through the people.


O God, even when i tried to hide from YOU at times like Jonah.
i thought i could hide from You
but in the end,
You always come in so gently beside me
to hug me in Your tender arms
to bring words of comfort to my heart:
My child, i have not forsaken you
not even a moment I left you
i have been with you watching over you
when u are about to fall down as you tried walking,
My hands are ready to catch you
when u are about to give it all up,
My arms are ready to support and lift you up
when the sadness in your heart overwhelms you
My tears flow with you
I AM here to exchange with you
your weariness with My strength
your sadness with My joy
your anxiety with My peace"
o God, Your everlasting promise is so sweet to our souls
always bring forth a ray of hope to me when our EYES are impaired
restore our sight to Your Will
that we can always follow to You through
Untill we see it!
Praise be unto You God!
(oh, btw, if it sound to u like a poetry, all glory to Him, coz i was inspired by Him as i worte this down) - a moment to be with Him
:)

Mothering-taste of it

i am single, not married, with no children.
hehe....u know later why i state this....:P

its not easy to do something out of me....
remembering tt time when You first called me...
was at B1 cuppage with Choon Yam...still rem those words i told him about what You showed me....

then it was a journey of more than 1+ year now...
people come and people go...
sometmies up and sometimes down
at times, like a smooth sailing slope theres time to rest and relax
at times, like uphill, theres time to stretch and labor hard...
whatever it is, You have been so faithful
that
wu2 hua4 ke3 shuo1 ( maybe i shld write a chinese poetry next time about Him, until He says la)
about who You are
along this process of who You showed Yourself to be as of now

somehow this resting time at home
got me to be very encouraged about
MOTHERING
yes, a task which i think even lack in the kids nowadays... ( m not going into tt for now)
(but i think always good for mothers to be around the kids when they are growing up, at least until they are "old" enough, i mean not to over shelter them, but to guide them in biblical ways etc...)
back to mothering...
i sense a "achievement" as mothering CG.....( ok, not that i m treating all you gals and guys as kids lo, nor taking the "credits" etc....)
but tt kind of shepherding....probably.
a nurturing heart, if it better describe it.
coz i was very glad, without the "mother" around.
you all can take care of yourselves.
One: God is real in your lives.
Second: its a healthy CG. Rem Eph 4:15-16.
( if everyone depends on a human person to move or grow, hm, where's the discipleship? everything would have fallen like sand, no foundation.)

i really felt so encouraged to hear CG went as well and people are rising up to be discipled for GOd.
as a "mother", i felt like tt.
the kind of joy which like a mother seeing her kids growing up and knowing how to take care of themselves.

Psa 119:49-50
Remember Your promise to me,
for it is my only hope.
Your promise revives me,
it comforts me in all my troubles.

and....perhaps, its time also for the kids, rather the growing children to know how to take care of others....
life's constant thing is change.
Let changes take place, according to Your will
coz without it, we may never grow.

Sin vs Virus

the entry that was in the previous blog : the Virus story

there can be sin in my life.( the virus in me)
if i dont deal with it, cure it etc...whatsoever.
it can creep into others' life. ( the virus just spreads to others)
not tt i have the power or i am in control etc.
but people can "capture" it unknowingly
EG: if i tend to say negatively about a situation. person.
hearers sooner or later would do like wise if they themselves are not aware.

Sin creeps into our life so easily.

and it most hurts when those who "caught" it are your loved ones.

O God, protect us.
give us eyes to detect sin in our lives
guard our lives
lead us to Your everlasting ways.
As leaders, may we always be aware of our ways so that we will not infect Your sheep in this sheep pen.
We leave to Your sovereignity
To guide and to show.
amen!

Inspiration form Froggy

Life's lesson No. 1

There once was a bunch of tiny frogs, ..who arranged a running competition.The goal was to reach the top of a very high tower.
A big crowd had gathered around the tower to see the race and cheer on the contestants...The race began...
Honestly...No one in the crowd really believed that the tiny frogs would reach the top of the tower.
You heard statements such as:"Oh, WAY too difficult!!!" They will NEVER make it to the top!!!" or:"Not a chance that they will succeed. The tower is too high!!!"

The tiny frogs began collapsing. One by one...Except for those, who in a fresh tempo, were climbing higher and higher...
The crowd continued to yell, "It is too difficult!!! No one will make it!!!" More tiny frogs got tired and gave up...But ONE continued higher and higher and higher...
This one wouldn't give up!!! At the end everyone else had given up climbing the tower. Except for the one tiny frog who, after a big effort, was the only one who reached the top!

THEN all of the other tiny frogs naturally wanted to know how this one frog managed to do it?
A contestant asked the tiny frog how he had found the strength to succeed and reach the goal? It turned out...That the winner was DEAF!!!

The wisdom of this story is:NEVER listen to other people's tendencies to be negative or pessimistic...
Because they take your most wonderful dreams and wishes away from you...the ones you have in your heart!!!
Always think of the power words have.
Because everything you hear and read will affect your actions!!!Therefore:ALWAYS be...POSITIVE!!!
And above all:Be DEAF when people tell YOU that you can not fulfill your dreams!!!
Always think:God and I can do this!!!

Don't tell GOD how Big your storm is. Tell the storm how Big your GOD is!

His Voice, faithfulness.

15/09/05
was a terrible day at school.
was so so discouraged....:(
a "bad" day. at least tt hows i feel.
seems like nothing to give thanks about.
aiyo, really meh, i knew God is watching over yet i cant give thks, nor to be joyful lo.
anyway.....
something happen at sch, first time.
discouraged about the influences kids have or rather the way they are brought up.
or rather....
went into staff rm after tt, saw hui shan, told her what happen,
thank God,
she gave some advices on how i can deal with it. etc....
went home, din even have the "mood" to mark books.
left it there.
wanted so much to go home straight away, to just let my "sadness" to God.
and....the unimaginable happen.
i forgot to bring my keys out in the morning.
mum went outside.
no one at home.
locked out.
hai....:(
plus its raining....pouring.
cant go anywhere.
so sat at the staircase.
inside of me, "take this time to spend with Me"
i read His word.
so loud woh.
"Dont be troubled, Trust in Father, trust also in Me" Jesus said. John 14:1
decided to pray. to listen. to still before Him.
"I want to show you this situation, to open your eyes, to see what is happening in schools now. to paint you a picture of what kind of challengs may come your way. to be clear of this path. to show so that you can seek Me to decide, yet, I AM with you. I will guide...."
and i knew in my heart and in spirit, God hears, He knows, and He answers.
Thank You God!

CG
leading worship as guitarist at the same time.
first time!
was so so great!
what a breakthrough. indeed, its about Holy Spirit leading.
about the heart of worship.
not abt the skills of guitartist.
Thank God for sandy to come in to help in leading praise.
every and anything can go wrong.
but when our hearts are drawn to God, nothing will go wrong, for He is ever so loving!
then YC came right after tt to tell me he's ready.
and another answered prayer!
was praying for him, for this bro to have faith in what God has given him!
and he's ever so soft and serving towards God, tt he hears God calling him
PTL! thank You God.
what a day!
He has turn my mourning into dancing!
Sorrow into Joy!

Sat
meet SQ for shepherding.
i thought it was Your thought.
i had thought so.
as i shared with SQ, then i ask was it You?
did i lost the sensitvity to recognize Your voice?

Superstar Karaoke.
still have difficulty. i know some of them had tried. and i know one even "led" by example. i see their hearts and intentions. i wanted to try, still a bit more to go out of "me" bah, i guess.
anyway, i thank God, for i am who i am, and i am still Your beloved.
until i see You.until i see it. then prob tt will make things easy for me to change.
Vinc, rach, YC, Kim,Den, Lystia, Hendry, Poy, Shiming, Su Ching, shuwei, Law, Zen, J, Pei key, li siong,KK.

Sun
Thank You.
for the intercession.
to once again experience You.
usually we pray for things we read from bulletin, pray for svc, preacher, for other matters in church.
once again, You have led us!
today, nothing much was mentioned in bulletin abt what'd the psg is going to be.
we dun even know what was the psg by the guest speaker...
somehow, Holy Spirit led.
we pray along about breakthroughs in our lives!
and as i joined in for the 2nd svc.
sermon: 5 Keys to breakthoughs"
wow! what revelation!
we didnt know what to pray, yet as we allow Holy Spirit to lead.
He showed.
so nice, so touched.
not only because we prayed according to Holy Spirit's leading,
but also i was personally encouraged to hear, and so much touched to know He just wanted to let me know:
" My dear child. I know what u are thinking, feeling. I hear you, I just want to let you know I have spoken. I will make you even more senisitive to Me, My voice..., you had not lost the ability to hear from Me....Keep seeking, keep asking....."

went down to the front of Nexus audi today.
two breakthoughs i wanted to be prayed for.
1) Work 2) missions.
Leave to You, Lord.

Moon cake
Bright full Moon.
Let the Light of Jesus shine even more brighter in our hearts!
amen!

For Law:1st experience at Hope

Haha...for LAW.
i mean lawerence.
"sneaked" into his blog..heee
saw one of his blog: 1st experience with Hope.
shall share my here.

two things
one
first encounter Hope people , tt time they call themselves "Hoppies" erm...:p
i got their them wrong at the first time, so i always thoght they mean they are people who hop around....heehaaa..
i rem the first person i mt in NTU, a brother who came up to me with a "good" smile and ask me if i can spend some time do survey.
i thot was polite to stop and do the survey, coz i would not wnat to make any "enemies" on my first day at NTU plus i was alone....better do what i can do la.
and actually after completing, i ask him for directions to the bus stop.
so tt i can go back to bedok from Boon Lay
erm....guess what he did, he showed my all the way from medical centre to the bus stop at the building near er,now i cant rem what building. its the bus stop after the turn after hall 3 i think...
anyway, it jus a very long walk to me lo, for a "stranger" to send me all the way...
erm, "over-helpful"
but tts also the deep impression created ya!

second.
1st visit at Hope Church, tt time, Hope of God singapore
erm...not at a building with a cross on top?!
its at ulu place of Kreta Ayer People's Theatre?!
so many elderly gather there....
and i went in...so dark ya. hm....bit like some secret gathering lo....hee....at least to my impression tt time.

ya, tt's my first impression of church.
eh, did i blog this before?
not sure....at least now i cant rem. unless some kind free soul would like to check for me.
somehow seems like i write before...
anyway.....old pple like me ...its ok, just bear with me. :)
and its for Gao de lo....
and whoever misses my last blog which i wrote abt it...if i ever did tt.....:P

missing him for 100th day

just want to blog my thoughts and feelings today

as said by my siblings.
today is the 100th day for my dad.
even tho i dun count the days, coz usually they do this for the rituals thingy.
thank God there's no more rituals on the 100th day.

today,
glad to have unti CG.
been sometime we see one another together as a unit!
cryst, peikey, li siong, rui zhi, bernard, marissa, jingyu, ian,lystia, vincent, kim, dennis, gr, shiming, poy, rach, sandy, june, yi cheng, lawrence.
my heart is glad to see few who i long to see them at CG.
thank You God for them who came.

liked this worship song we sang at unit today.
the greatest thing in all my life is knowing You

shared something today which just came out,
when the going gets tough, the tough gets going.
somehow it also encourages me when i said tt.

few lingered a bit more before we moved to maxwell.
bernard, june, marissa, sandy, rach and me.
was touched by what june said to me personally.
:) (ohoh, its just btw me and her)
Lord, keep watch over them and safe in You.

was late, poy offered to bring us back by car.
Guangrong who initially wanted to take the bus back from SK.
so that he can planned the sat event with me.
thankful for his "extra many miles"
ended up we discussed the sat event together, GR, Rach, Poy and me.
Lord, let our serving always be pleasing before You
we can make many plans, but You are the One who determines the steps.

as i reach home.
somehow my heart just fill up with his face and thoughts of our times together.
felt appreciative of those who prayed for my dad.
Heaven is a wonderful place.
filled with glory and grace.
i want to see my Saviour face.
( i want to see my dad 'soon")
Heaven is a wonderful place.
-a praise song sang in unit time today.

a day that i miss my dad too.
recd sms from poy. sometimes, his "crazy' ( rather fun side of him) can lift up others' spirit. thank God for him, he said something which reminded me to keep on praying for my family so that we all can meet my dad again altogether! amen!

Lord, i ask for a loving relationship with You
not just knowing about You through WOG
but to interact, to communicate, to ask and recd, to wrestle, to listen
the still small whisper
not in earthquake, not in fire,
"where are you, my daughter,cc"
Father is a wonderful God!
Give tks!

Step into it.

sep one week holidays.
so nice, and going to make use of it.
to be infilling and immerse in Him.
to be joyful in the Lord, and rejoice! giving thanks!

what we do the things we attempt shows God in us.
a great God in us, we attempt great things in life.

since june.
the soft whisper to do tt thing.
things in life cropped up.
nvr get down to do it.
gave myself excuses to say that time was not good time.

then remember on a sun sermon, think was through Ps dinah talked about it again.
it hit me again...
but in my "me" thoughts, i didnt take any step.

and again, during separate two ocassions during Hope Sem, through Ps Law and Charmaine, they brought it up the necessity of it. somehow, the still small voice whisper in my inner spirit.
but.....

guess it was the last draw.
God must be patient enough to let me hear once again.
at the coffee shop with cryst, GR, siew yee, teck keong, buying food to go to vivian's place for a time of fellowship.
teck keong talked about him going driving thoery so that he can convert his msian one to spore's. and guohui also taking up the lesson.
he asked if i want to take together.
erm, er..."ok" went the response though i was not sure it came out from me.

a small episode.
how the still patient voice of God can be ringing in our inner spirit.
yet the qtn always come: do i want to take the step?
nothing happens when we dont answer the qtn.

over the past weeks, asked God to show His plans for me in areas of missions.
esp within this year till the next june 06.
while i keep asking why He didnt show confirmations, it dawns upon me that He is already taking steps to show me.
the next one step is to pick up the driving skills.
one that's so much needed in church planting.

driving.
my 2nd sis already has. my younger sis already learning.
so being "me" , i know i would rather them driving me around if need arises.
to take this driving course.
it not me, i know its out of my comfort zone.
let it be
coz through it, it would be a breakthrough in my life.
not in terms of skills acquiring only, but a reliance on Holy Spirit in growing to know Him better.
ever let it be
i would enjoy the process of picking up this skills together with You.

at the end of the day, would it turn out to be used in overseas?
i would not know.
for now i am sure
this step i need to take.
for much i will learn.
Thank God, You never gave up on me despite the many times You whisper to me.
Thank You that You open my ears to hear You
to still be sensitive to Your voice.

You are nearer than i think.
Always be full of joy in the Lord, and i say it again--Rejoice! Phil 4:4

--
not easy.
i tried with the utmost i can.
the thought came.
difficult to come before You.
because of my fallbility.
what shall i do?
yet i thank You for the word you showed thought a sms.
"giv all ur worries and cares to God, for He cares abt what happens to u....my purpose of writing is to encourage you and assure that the grace of God is wif u no matter what happens" 1Pet 5:7,12
in this world , we are not against flesh and blood but against the authorities, the principalities etc.....
Thank You for Your word that brought me up to You, the assurance of You being nearer than i think or felt.

For You chose me and called me by name,
and i am reaching for my destiny this future You have planned for me. (song)

God, desire to be near.
nearer.
Not "me" but Your will be done.
i continue grow to surrender to You my rights, my desires my thoughts.....
make it ever perfect in Your will.

--
Only need to go bakc school two days!
enjoyed being a contract teacher.
less things to do.
:P
but i got to "sun'tan" myslef again later...
basketball training.
argh, going to face the crazy bunch of boys again?!
God, be with me even at trainings!
Hee....
but some P3s are really very CUTE!!
cant resist the urge to pinch their faces!! haha!
its wonderful to talk with kids.
:)
let it be a wonderful day!
( still have lots of marking to do....the "bad" part about being teachers. always have markings piled up)

Thank YOu God
for all You have given.

Teachers Day

going to pen thoughts randomly....

coz so many things has happen over these days.

just recd a sms from her.
days ago, couldnt get to her, either she missed my calls, or i missed her calls.
somehow only through msgs we can get replies from one another.
its hard when u so much want to find out how the person is doing and what going in her life right now...
yet, there were not much replies.
but that will only caused me to contd to persevere on, to contd to keep her in prayer.
for only Him sees everything.
He has His own plan, at His timing.
today she msg me a little prayer short and sweet.
so nice to recd one such as this.
at least i know she still prays,
somewhere deep in her heart, God is still lingering in her.
Thank You God for being ever present help in times of need.
Pray that u will be touched knowing GOd is nearer than you think,
we are embracing you with our prayers for you that you will come back to where you stop
the unique role u have in this CG cannot be exchanged
i pray for you too, remember, you are a dear sister to me.

Recd today too, a few sms wishing me happy teachers' day.
haha, now one more day to celebrate, other than BD, new year, christmas, etc....and one more to come, children's day.
Paulin ( the very funny fren, whom i can chat with, even tho i thot we should have some sort of generation gap, hee) sandy, zhangting ( a very good fren whom always encouraged me a lot in my teaching job. she remembered my first day at work and msg me to encouraged me. we somehow got to know each other more now, esp we went through similar things happening in our family this year) Rachel, Cryst.

Also send msg to other fellow MOE colleagues in church to wish them:
at least those i know are, siew qin, xiao zhu, guangrong, dennis, kym toh, shenteng, chu kai.

God, use all of us in this area of teaching to impact more lives!

recd a couple of gifts from the kids.

on tues, 3 of them actually came to the staff room and wanted to give me presents.
one boy, he's very cute. in fact in class, he was the one who always "encourage" me:
teacher, u got to be more fierce so that the class will be afraid of me.
teacher, u can use the cane and hit the table so that the class will quieten down.
teacher,.... etc.
yes, yi bin, he is also very chatty in class.
something he said touched my heart as he was giving me the present to me,
" teacher i gave to you because i like you." ( in mandarin)
hm, from a little boy, that kind of childlikeness.
i was a bit taken aback too, dont know what to say in response.
so came a normal reply: thank you, lao shi need to rush in marking books, so you all better go home la...etc...hm, shuld have said something more encouraging for him. aiya. :P

then they came back again after a few mintues.
this time, a girl,Zi Qi, the monitoress. also very chatty one. but she is very responsible. tho always talk in class. and alwys play with the boy, Jin rong beside her.
she went to buy something after that.

on the celebration day,
the theme was "go Wild" alll teachers are encouraged to wear something related to animals...hm...thot wanted to wear a piggy t-shirt to sch, but then again,reconsider this idea.
find most teachers in Punngol are very fun loving people, on ocassion like these, they really let their hair loose and play with all the kids. even those i have seen them scolded kids very harshly, they became very fun loving people.
guess being a teacher is not easy.
are they who they really are when they step into the classroom?
or is it because of the circumstances that they had to appear that way so that they can have some class contrl management?
but i think to really have impact on the kids long term, need to give what we have inside of us.
and try not to be someone we are not, coz the kids may pick that up, and they may not be able capture the whole essence of it al.

then the most significant item during the concert was they played this song:
Becaused you loved me.
what a meaningful song.

then we went to zoo for a lunch buffet.
yes, ZOO! having lunch with all the animals! :)
anyway it a cool and nice place. a good idea, instead of the normal restaurant etc.
Forest Lodge.
the chairs and tables are decorated with linings/ cloths with animals' stripes.
different atmosphere.
had a good time knowing the teachers, especially, the other contract teacher, Yvonne and Huang lao shi.
laughs and getting to know them much more.
hm, she even invited me to go clubbing...hee. :)
hope to know them much more....

ya, then spotted intersting thing.
the Zoo even organised a "Zoo" themed wedding.
very interseting concept. just imgaine.....
haha, will suggest this to my "da ge" in church, since he said he's getting married soon next year.
aiyo, i wait until my neck got so long liao ya...
hm, i m sup to do the card design for him too....
hee....:P

anyway, like today's holiday.
had sometime for myself with God.
dun want to rush the time.

want to see the glory of You,
i believe.
You will reveal to me.
i reminded of the vision YOu showed when i first became a CL.
the path of step by step.
God, whats' more to come?
Pray that You will show.
that i may know and obey.

the driving license. got to do something about this.

more seeking of You so that i can very be sure of what You revealed to me.
and i trust because You will make a way.

Pray for my family as the date draw nearer, Lord, protect their emotions and heart.
let it only be moments of missing a person we hold close to our hearts,
remembering him and his impact in our lives.
that my family can grow out of this, stronger people because there is Your love holding us together as one.
Pray that my mum will know Your love, God, dont stop speaking into her life.
let not what she think is good for her, hinder her from You.
coz in busy life, we tend to keep You aside
forgetting all You are and what You have done.
God, draw her near to You as her heart soften before You.
Keep Xueyun, Caiyun, caihong, jingcai in Your safe arms.
For this is the only family members i have.
Thank You God, for the protection You have given to my family.
Your eyes ever watching over us.
Your hands ever guiding us.
Your strength ever uplifts us.
i look forward to the day my family can celebrate christmas together as a spiritual family too.
and many friends and church people can come together in the house for celebrations etc...
yeah! amen and it will be done!
In Jesus name.

God, guard my heart for it is the well spring of my life.
show me the things that will hinder me from You
that i can decide to let go of all the things.
i know it will be difficult but by Your grace, and power of Your love,
amen!

Ever let it be that i will praise Your name
at work, in class, talking with colleagues, with church friends, with family etc.

pray for some of my friends:
xiaodi, jason teo, peiyu, zhangting, paulin, alan, mei kuan, zhaotan, tsu jung, feng ping.

Thank You God for blessing me with so many friends.
amen!
God my heart hides You. Dwells there and be big in my heart! :)